“Poems by Louie” is a collection of original poems written by Louie Hesemann, in which he muses on life’s challenges as they relate to clutter. Sometimes serious, but more often with “tongue in cheek” humor, Louie explores the ironies, foibles, pitfalls, and triumphs encountered when dealing with our “stuff”. Enjoy!
Some News From A Friend (named Gloria)
By Louie 2/17/17
When you talked to me (about dealing with your clutter)
(You) “cleared off some space….
Boxed up some stuff…
And stored it someplace….”
But never once did I hear you say…
The four magic words:
“I threw it away!”
The “Estate Sale” Lady
You make a living, as best as you can…
…selling what the former owners couldn’t
take with them to their “promised land”.
Somethings’ precious – others you couldn’t give away.
You might find a box filled with gold coins
and a dead rat on the very same day.
You clean and organize houses that are worse than a mess
and deal with “hagglers” who always want to pay less.
Occasionally, you help some poor souls find and afford
something they needed but only dreamed of…
Or a collector obtain a rare object which she will always cherish and love.
You do all of the above, in the span of a week (which blows my mind)
and you leave a clean, empty house behind.
But “come hell or high water”, whatever takes place,
you survive and come through it all with a smile on your face!
The Estate Sale
By chance, at the end of an estate sale last Saturday afternoon,
I ran into the owner of the estate (a spry and skinny 92 yr old man).
He had just made arrangements for the final disposal of what property remained.
(Stuff was strewn all over the garage floor from wall to wall.)
I said, “You’ve probably thought of this moment for years.
How does it feel to be walking away from it all?”
He was getting into his car and knew he was leaving behind a cluttered past.
Buying and Trying
I think there are reasons to explain our particular excesses,
Like we can excuse “liars and boasters” (if they come out of Texas).
In our childhoods, we may have suffered mental and physical abuse…
From a “clean-freak” parent who had a “screw loose”.
Then, we join the poet in saying, “The very thought of you and I forget to do…
The very ordinary things that everyone ought to do.”
(We’ve taken a vacation from our social obligation…
To keep working at getting rid of our over-accumulation.)
I won’t be a killjoy and not allow myself to experience the fun…
of buying and trying new things, as long as I keep myself open
to getting rid of my clutter after the buying and trying is done.
Cleansing Ceremony (incantation for sage smudging)
Bing bang, uga walla, who say…
…bad clutter energy no go away?
I say, do an about face!
March your sorry ass outta’ my sacred space!
One, two, three, four… head on out my door!
Hit the road “Jack Clutter”, I don’t want you back no more!
Click on the link below for instructions on how to cleanse your living space using a sage smudge. You can use Louie’s incantation above or make up your own…whatever works for you…
Sage smudging sticks come in a variety of types: white, blue and green. They can be purchased locally at Van’s Health Foods in downtown Livermore, CA, Amazon.com and Walmart.com amongst many other vendors on the internet.
Third Brain 10/01/15
Since I found out about the newfangled “third brain” I’ve got,
I’ve been using mine quite a lot.
It’s called a “frontal cerebral cortex” and when I heard
I had one, I was amused.
As far as I know, mine has never been used.
Our guest speaker said, “mankind’s logic, visualization and problem solving ability can just explode.
Here, all this time I’ve been stuck in my “reptilian” and “mammalian” brain mode…
…which means you have “road rage”
(like a reptile and like an animal) you never get enough.
And you’re a clutterer and hard to live with ‘cause you’re always so gruff.
Since I’ve been using my new “cerebral cortex brain”,
I’m walking taller. My problems are smaller.
Logic and visualizations make me smarter and stronger…
…not reacting to peoples’ bad driving any longer.
Other peoples’ opinions about me don’t make me sore.
Rude people don’t get my goat anymore.
Farewell to using my reptilian and mammalian brain,
I will never stoop down to your level again.
I will be kinder, tidier and more polite, it’s true –
because they are all “logical” things to do.
Rock Paper Scissors 08/23/15
Rock, is where we live – you and I.
Scissors is our power to cut through the clutter and choose…
the “essential” stuff and toss out the “crap” that we never use.
I’m going to recycle myself
(get down basic’ly to just who I am).
Trapped inside me I know there’s my original man…
…(who’s buried in surplus junk that isn’t me).
That’s why I’m throwing my useless garbage away
and re-finding myself to get free!
It’s time that we parted, my “cluttered past”.
Today I hold the hammer
and tossed all your broken pieces into the slammer.
And I throw away the key.
That isn’t easy for me.
Cause I still remember all the hopes we once had
In my cluttered memory.
But the more stuff I hoarded the more I “felt a lack”.
Now I’m better off without you,
And I sure as hell won’t let you come back!
Life may sometimes give us lemons (which aren’t at all sweet).
Afterwards, it may take time to get back on our feet.
Meanwhile, let’s make lemonade.
The fact that we’re here tonight is a positive step we have
I’m here to warn you about a deceptive substitute for pleasure.
It feels real at first, but leaves you empty (and that’s an over-accumulation
If there’s something in your house that doesn’t function for right
now, get rid of it period. You have no use for it anyhow.
Get simple again. Get pleasure like kids do, the old-fashioned
way. From exercise, religion (if you will), work, sex, leisure
activities and play.
You had a rich emotional life once so go back to that core.
Hoarded treasure won’t give you the freedom you crave. It only
traps you more and more and more and more!
I think most of us clutterers (or former clutters) would agree,
too much stuff has not made us free.
It did not bring us the satisfaction we intended it to be.
But, so what? We live in a land of freedom where we are free to make mistakes
And then we are free to correct them and try again (whatever it takes)!
We know now that buying each item gave us a thrill like cocaine! But in the long run, getting rid of our accumulated stuff causes us lots of pain.
So what are we to do? Get our thrill from going to the beach or somewhere else like going dancing or getting a massage or visiting a zoo?
But if we see something out there we are really wanting to buy…
Hey, life is a “learning experience” … nobody can say you can’t give it a try.
But you’re also free to kiss that bargain goodbye!